Call the roller of big cigars,
The muscular one, and bid him whip
In kitchen cups concupiscent curds.
Let the wenches dawdle in such dress
As they are used to wear, and let the boys
Bring flowers in last month’s newspapers.
Let be be finale of seem.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.

Take from the dresser of deal,
Lacking the three glass knobs, that sheet
On which she embroidered fantails once
And spread it so as to cover her face.
If her horny feet protrude, they come
To show how cold she is, and dumb.
Let the lamp affix its beam.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.

Headline: Somali pirates release ship without ransom.

“About 50 cats, 20 ducks and 15 turkeys were taken from a New Smyrna Beach home, and a woman was arrested after her 84-year-old mother told authorities that she kept warm by covering herself with the animals, according to Volusia County sheriff’s deputies.

Mary Bosket, 54, was arrested on a charge of neglect to the elderly after her mother was found on Thanksgiving Day at the Glencoe Road home, which was in deplorable conditions and did not have a working heater, deputies said.”

“

Once Edward and Bella get together, Bella is completely dependent upon him. He becomes her entire life. Bella has no friends outside of Edward. The few people she talks to are so few and far between, they hardly count. The closes thing Bella has to a friend outside of Edward is Jacob, but she gives him up once Edward becomes jealous, and forbids their hanging out. After two weeks of being together, Bella decides to give up her life and become a vampire. Pretty bad, huh? And the worst part is, the only reason given for Bella loving Edward is how hot he is. There are seriously over 100 references to Edward’s beauty in the first book alone. I counted.

Now what kind of message is that? A guy is worth everything so long as he’s hot? Never do Bella and Edward have a real conversation where falling in love happens. All we hear from Bella is how insanely gorgeous Edward is. Never once does Bella even spare a thought for any of her other “friends”. And that seems to set a theme for Twilight. That your boyfriend is the most important thing in your life.

Bella is a weak character. In the beginning of the first book, a boy pricks his finger and Bella almost faints at the sight of it so, of course, one of the boys in her class has to take her out. And this is just the first instance of Bella having to be saved by a big strong man. As the book progresses, Bella finds herself in various dangerous situations. She almost gets hit by a truck. Guess who saves her? Edward. Bella goes with her friends on a shopping trip to seem normal, and she separates from her friends and ends up an a back alley with some guys who want to take advantage of her. Does she scream? Call for help? Try to fight for herself? She thinks about it, then remembers she’s a girl so what’s the point? But then Edward swoops in and saves the day! This continues on throughout the whole book. Normally while Bella describes her intense fear, and how she feels like feinting. Typical damsel in distress. This girl is nothing with out her man. In fact, in New Moon, she because some depressed that she can’t even remember what went on in her life for three months when Edward leaves. Real healthy.”

I used to roll the dice

Feel the fear in my enemies eyes

Listen as the crowd would sing: